Clueless
I hate this. Life is just so hard sometimes. Especially when you don’t have anyone to talk to about it. I mean, some things you can’t talk about to your mom and dad right? And even if you can, what’s the point? The way I see it, the only possible outcome of talking about your problems is getting more depressed, getting the person you are talking to depressed, or getting the person you are talking to angry. You never get anything solved. Everyone says, “Talk about your problems! It will make you feel better!” I don’t believe that. It can’t be true. How can you feel better, if all that is different is the fact that you aren’t depressed alone anymore?
And then there are those people who keep saying, “What’s wrong? I hate seeing you so down.” If they can’t figure it out themselves...then maybe they weren’t meant to at all! And if they have something to do with it, why is it always so alien to them?
It is so hard to find someone who you can talk to without always having on your mind “God...I hope I’m not leaving a bad impression!” Is there really anyone out there who doesn’t care?!
And then there are those people who keep saying, “What’s wrong? I hate seeing you so down.” If they can’t figure it out themselves...then maybe they weren’t meant to at all! And if they have something to do with it, why is it always so alien to them?
It is so hard to find someone who you can talk to without always having on your mind “God...I hope I’m not leaving a bad impression!” Is there really anyone out there who doesn’t care?!
posted by 
@ 12:07 am
7 Comments:
At 6:59 am, January 18, 2005,
Aveek said…
Probably... there is definitely someone out there who couldn't care a flaming shot-glass of vodka bout it. But trust me, you do NOT wanna meet him...
You should talk bout your problems.. if not to mum or dad, or even a friend, then to yourself. You should write it down in a diary. Anything powerful - or at least, powerful enough to shake you up - should be let out, and recorded...
Or you could trey introspection. Figure out why you are so buged, and see if theres any (il?)logical way to fix it... sometimes just thinking about it exhausts your thoughts, and you find that youre fine witth it - though Ive never personally ben of that opinion...
In the end, its really upto you how you take things. If you're looking for someone who doesn't care, look inside, and sometimes you'll find that you might just be that person. Don't give a damn, and it can't bother you anymore...
(Thats what Im doing at Geeksha...!)
At 7:38 am, January 18, 2005,
Meghna said…
No...I meant is there anyone out there who would just listen to you, and not care about what impression you are leaving?
I wish I was that person. But I'm not. I'm better being the one listening. And who do you talk to when the ones you usually talk to are the ones who don't understand? And then you have this added thought that you might sound weak, or insecure.
I think I'm just better off keeping it bottled up.
At 3:46 am, January 19, 2005,
Anonymous said…
why do you think you are leaving a bad impression? don't you think its a little hasty to say that"i'm not gona talk to anyone coz i'll leave a bad impression." what if you AREN'T leaving a bad impression? isn't that letting opportunity slip through your fingers? infact, if you are sharing your feelings with someone close to you, someone you know all senses of the word, then why should you even be thinking about the impression you'll make? it just shows lack of faith in that person,and in yourself too.
i completely agree with aveek on the record method. if you're speaking to yourself, then what's the threat of a bad impression? infact, this gives you a chance to know yourself much better. bottling up of feelings always has a negative effect... what goes in will come out one day - and the last thing you'd want is for it to come to surface in the wrong places, at the wrong times.
take care...
At 11:12 pm, January 19, 2005,
Meghna said…
I don't know why I think that! Come on...none of this is rational! I suppose you are right, that I'm letting opportunity slip, but I guess I've learnt the hard way not to trust too easily!
Lots of people have told me not to keep things bottled up...and I know they are probably right...I guess I just use the blog as an outlet??
At 11:17 pm, January 19, 2005,
Meghna said…
Hey, by the way...who are you?!
At 8:42 pm, January 22, 2005,
Anonymous said…
u cant always just expect people to figure out whats wrong! and sometimes they do im sure but it isnt easy to talk to people who dont want to talk about it but expect u to understand what the prob is and put everything right just like that! maybe the fact that u cant find anyone to talk to is not because people dont understand u or dont care about u but perhaps because u arent ready to open up and frankly say what ur prob is! dont always expect things...uve got to be ready to give too...have u ever thought that ur friends might have problems too and ur not the only one dealing with difficulty?! and if u have so many pent up feelings and frustrations just get it out! forget about leaving impressions of any kind...its not helping u or ur friend if u just keep quiet!
hang in there...things arent always as bad as they seem...
At 12:47 am, January 23, 2005,
Meghna said…
I actually don't have expectations anymore. What I'm saying is simply that I don't want to talk about things sometimes, and I wish people wouldn't push it! Yes, maybe the problem is with me rather than other people, and I don't think the world revolves around me. But I was hardly saying that there was a problem at all! Have you ever heard of something called cribbing? That's what I was doing! Letting it out, through writing. Maybe that's my way...must I follow yours? Can we just drop it?
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